Mar 5 2007

Spongecake

After that very heavy last post (thank you for letting me get that out), I am going to keep this light and airy. Like spongecake.

Let me preface this by revealing that the Internet is my concubine (oh I know: only males have concubines, yada yada yada, but give me a break—I just called the Internet my concubine). Someone—*cough G cough*—may add, “uninvited concubine,” (although that seems like an oxymoron), but oh Concubine! how I love thee!

I foresee one of those “it’s-either-me-or-it” ultimatums in my near future. So PLEASE someone-with-more-ambition-than-I: I beg you to open a fancy rehab facility for Internetters Anonymous. I say someone-with-more-ambition-than-I because I am lazy. And I say fancy because I’m a snob and want to rehab it up with celebs like Britney and Keith and Lindsay, not the trolls who lurk and skulk around random site after random site.

Oh wait, that’s me.

Well. Anyway. I thought I would share a few of my favorite, funny, and mind-/time-suckage links, courtesy of my loverly concubine. Concubine comforts me when I’m sad; entertains me when I’m bored; feeds me when I’m curious; and supports my hypochondria when I’m suffering from a life-threatening paper cut that I’ve Web MD-diagnosed. Because Lord knows I don’t have anything better to do with my spare time except spend it canoodling with my concubine.

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best of craigslist (Who are these people and where can I find their blogs??)

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Guess the Dictator and/or Television Sit-Com Character (I can’t stop until I beat that damn thing.)

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Beloved Babbling reminded me of this one: Overheard in NY (Thanks, Beloved!)

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Haiku-O-Matic

This haiku is for you, Married to Asian lady in San Francisco:
Your Asian lady
Sentimental? Perhaps not.
Funny? Fo’ shizzle.

If you return east
Then your site shall receive help
No charge for white man.

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Cluttered Mom Journals
You’ll love her. Her Peanut is adorable. She won’t judge you if you want to webcam your muffintop over IM. And she and her now-husband, aka MTALISF (see above), kindly requested haikus from their wedding guests in lieu of RSVPs. No shit. It’s ingenious. If you couldn’t guess, ours was very bad (I think we quoted Gladiator). But maybe you can convince her to include some of the good ones on her shiny new blog.

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The other night I had a conversation with G. I asked him to recall a detail about a fart he once had. (Yes, because his farts come with their own stories and details.) He hesitated before answering, then naively asked, “Is this going to be on your blog?”

Oh you silly man. Of course it is.

His question reminded me of this video from Henri: Scenes From a Marriage: Bloglight. Watch it. It’s freakin’ hilarious. And I’m wondering how many others have had conversations similar to this… Because I have a feeling that I’m not the only one whom my concubine is seeing. Yes?

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News. Gossip. Videos. Shops. Weather reports. Live action updates of a building in the middle of nowhere. Blogs. Bloggers. Blogging. I. Can’t. Stop.



9 Comments

  1. Angela
    Posted March 6, 2007 at 1:55 pm | Permalink

    We could be the charter members, of Internetters Anon… group meetings via IM of course! ;-)

    Let’s not forget Eonline, laineygossip, People.com, they’re always good for a laugh when you want to read about the antics of the Hollywood airheads.

  2. kim
    Posted March 6, 2007 at 2:21 pm | Permalink

    Oh boy, angela said IM… Now THAT could really suck us all in!

  3. Carol
    Posted March 6, 2007 at 9:57 pm | Permalink

    I love the Internet, too. The few friends I do have around here, the only way we could connect is though e-mail and blogs anyway! We’re all so busy taking care of things at home, prisoners of our children’s nap/eating schedules, or out with kids, husband, etc. trying to just get stuff done.

  4. honglien123
    Posted March 7, 2007 at 5:09 am | Permalink

    Hello my name is Lien, if you have a 12 step program please let me know. My personal drugs of choice are very nerdy, damninteresting.com and wikipedia. I know, I’m not even cool enough to have a cool website addiction (although all the blogs I read are VERY VERY cool and trendy).

  5. Beloved
    Posted March 8, 2007 at 2:12 am | Permalink

    Love the concubine metaphor! I am–as I type–supposed to be doing something for that damn job (of teaching) that I have. I just can’t stop reading blogs. Someone. please. help me. stop.

  6. Mama Nabi
    Posted March 8, 2007 at 4:53 pm | Permalink

    Of course now I’m addicted to our little community but I remember being addicted to all and every parenting site out there.
    Man, I tried that Dictator/Sitcom thing - I did win a couple of times… but maybe because I didn’t know half the answers and guessed! :-)

  7. Mama Nabi
    Posted March 8, 2007 at 4:58 pm | Permalink

    Of course now I’m addicted to our little community but I remember being addicted to all and every parenting site out there.
    Man, I tried that Dictator/Sitcom thing - I did win a couple of times… but maybe because I didn’t know half the answers and guessed! :-)

  8. Rachel
    Posted March 8, 2007 at 8:00 pm | Permalink

    Right there with you on the Internet addiction. I love Best of Craigslist. It never fails to make me laugh.

  9. mary mary
    Posted March 9, 2007 at 2:41 am | Permalink

    how can i be only the 32nd person to choose angela from who’s the boss?

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